Wake up

Tight throat

Eyes blink open

Bright light blinks into eyes

Bright eyes blinking

The light is too bright

Thinking

Where did the blinking come from

Where did the feeling come from

Feeling

Feeling overwhelmed

So suddenly after waking up

Tight throat

Wake up

Get up

Walk to the bathroom

Feel the nausea

Throat is too tight

Then throat is too sore

Dry heaving

Nothing is there

Nothing to do

Nothing to be done

Except

Go through the motions

Pretend

Everything is alright

Pretend to be alright

Blurred motions

Blurred vision

Pretending to be reality

Nothing to be done

Everything to do

Nothing is done

Get up

Go to school

Get to work

Do work

Work is not done

Nothing is done

Nothing wants to be done

Everything hurts

Everything shakes

Shaking awake

Try to stop

Can’t stop

Can’t breathe

Can’t move

Have to move

Have to walk

Walking helps

Breathing helps too

Out and in

Hold in

Not too fast

Breathe

Sip water

Splash water

Hold on

Don’t scratch

Don’t

It hurts

Keep moving

Keep moving on

Keep breathing

Keep hurting

Go through the motions

Pretend

It’s alright

Pretend to be alright

Get up

Keep walking

Get in bed

Keep moving

Can’t sleep

Move places

Hold your breath

Count to ten

Go to sleep

Sleep

Can’t sleep

Wake up

Repeat

© Bianca Greyvenstein

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5 Comments

  1. So powerful. The form and the words really make this unusual and strong. Thanks!

  2. Powerful! Ah… that vicious cycle. We keep going and we hope the new day will be better. At least you’re writing. 🙂 Much love to you and warmest hugs. Mwah! xxx

  3. Pingback: Binx Thinx About: Waiting and Creativity - Binx Thinx

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